In My Trouble He Saved Me

Week 2 of the online bible study Stressed-Less Living-  Finding Gods Peace in Your Chaotic World by Tracie Miles  took me on an emotional roller coaster ride.  Emotions of awe, sadness, frustration, stubbornness and brokenness took their turns on me as I read through chapter two. From the scriptures to the exercise and the reality check of my attitudes that causes some of my stress, I realized how much I try to fix that I cannot fix and how unwilling I am to work on things that are in my control.

This week's scripture is Psalms 107:19-21:
19.Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress. 20. He sent out His word and healed them; He rescued them from the grave. 21. Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and His wonderful deeds for mankind.

We were asked by Linda Kuhar, our OBS leader this week, to write out these verses using our names so to make it personal to us in order that it comes alive in our spirit.  How many times do we read a scripture that uses "man" or "Israel" or "they" and quickly read over it thinking it was being spoke to those back in Jesus' day and never apply it to us?

My mom, whom I miss so deeply, used to spend HOURS in God's word re-writing scripture to make it her own, inserting her name, or "I", "Me", or "My" into them so that the word became a living letter to HER. She then broke down the common words that we say so often that we don't even realize their meanings, in order to fully grasp what God intended for us to receive.  So this assignment was right up my alley.

Here is my version of Psalms 107:19-21

19. Then I cried to the Lord in my trouble and He saved me from my (extreme anxiety, sorrow or pain).
20. He sent out His word and healed me; He rescued me from my (serious, heavy, or solemn issues).
21. I give thanks to the Lord for His (completely dependable and endless) love and His wonderful (actions performed intentionally) for me!

Can I just say one word?  Wow!

What a difference current English and personalization makes when reading the scriptures.  I went from reading sumpin', sumpin' about someone crying out to God and His deeds to mankind... to my God saving ME from my anxiety. Rescuing ME from my serious issues. And cheerfully giving thanks to Him for His completely dependable and endless love and His premeditated wonderful actions that He preforms for ME!  

How can we NOT love a God like that?  That realization played in big time when I did the stress chart exercise in the book.  We were to take a personal stress self-assessment, listing people, problems and/or circumstances that are causing stress in our lives right now (these stressors change as we move through life).   I was surprised when I put down my husband as one of my stressors.  He and I have been married for a long time and we have overcame many, many trials. I can honestly say I am more in love with him today than I was the day I married him.  Many people didn't think we would survive in our marriage, including us at one time, but we did and are stronger today for it.  So why did my husband become my stressor again?

Without going into deep detail, we've gone through many changes in a short few years that has interrupted our "normal" routine in life and has put us in different territory than we've been before. Let me preference this with the fact that I love my husband very much and I know he loves me. But I have felt that we have disconnected on some levels which has left me feeling isolated and insecure. Often I find myself irritated with him for no "good" reason.  (Is there really ever a good reason for irritability?)

So, back to the assignment, in the assessment we were asked if we had control or power to change our stressors. I began to write "no" in the area where I listed my husband, because I know we can never  change our spouses, only God can.  Well yes I can change that, because I can pray.  This is true, I can pray and have sorely neglected praying for him and us in my prayer life. We get along just fine, I love him, no troubles on the home front, so like many of us, it wasn't an "issue" to pray about therefore I haven't prayed for him or our relationship.  Busted!  Lesson learned on that one. 

But something was still nagging me when I began to pray.  I feel isolated, insecure, and irritated (a sign of stress for sure) and I have been realizing lately that it is me that is pulling away from my honey as much as he is pulling away from me, which causes me to pull away from him, which causes him....to stay in this vicious cycle until it is broken!  Stay with me in this loop. 

In Psalms 107: 19-21 we read how God gave to us. God saved ME, He rescued ME, He healed ME. His  wonderful actions are preformed intentionally for ME. That makes me love Him!  He did for us, which we love Him for that.  We are human and are incapable of a true God love here on earth. He knows that in order for us to love, we need to feel loved. He first loved us, so we love him back. He shows His love for us over and over again and we need to continually realize that love or we fall out of love.  In order to stay in love with God we need to spend time with Him and meditate on the love that He continually pours out on us.

God is a great teacher. In an instant of recognizing this truth, I realized that I need to do the same for my honey.   Remember, I can 't change him, but God can, and God uses us, ME as that tool. God first loved us, intentionally. If I want the love that I feel I am missing in my relationship with my honey, I need to love him intentionally. (This is where that rebelliousness came in.  Why am I always the one to give, give, give...) BUT, just like in verse 21 when I felt the elation of thanksgiving to God for His intentional love for me, I had that instant reflection of what I had to do.  If I want to feel that love from my husband, I need to love him intentionally.  I need to reach out to him where he needs to feel loved and intentionally love him there. In return I trust that I will reap the love benefits from him.  I have to love him as God loves me.  

John 13: 34-35 says  34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."  Gods commandment to loves others as He loved us speaks to us in so many areas of our lives. It's not just our neighbors, it's not just turning the other cheek. This is real, this scripture, this commandment saves our relationships!  In my troubles, He saves me.




Comments

  1. Mindy, how very encouraging your blog is. Blessings to you on the stress reduction... i agree, more time spent soaking in god's word does wonders for the soul, and the stress just melts away. But it is true, emotions do have a way of taking us on unexpected journeys. I will be praying for you... and if you would, pray for me regarding that too.

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    1. Praying for you Barbara. If we could all just make the time to soak in His word to us each and every day, instead of just sitting down to read a bunch of scriptures! Not that we shouldn't read as His word will not return void, but to really soak in His word..to US. Thanks for commenting. Blessings on you.

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  2. Denise CollinsApril 18, 2013

    I loved reading your blog. Thank you for sharing your heart and being so open. Praying for you on your journey!
    Denise (OBS Group Leader)

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    1. Thank you Denise for being a part of the OBS study. I love reading the blogs and how God is using this study to speak to the hearts of the women involved. Thanks for stopping by. Blessings on you.

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  3. Thank you, Mindy, for your excellent example of our 'assignments' for this study. Seeing your breakdown of the scripture and how you applied it to your life is so refreshing and encourages me to do that more often. Blessings and less stress to you!

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    1. Thank you. I love that my mother instilled this in me and am only sorry it's taken me so long to brush off the dust and do it again! I am thankful that you left my blog encouraged. That is what it's all about! Blessings on you.

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